A QUARREL BETWIXT TWO LOVERS (AN EXPERIMENT WITH ARCHAIC SPEECH PATTERNS)

Timmy Zhang

Cassy: Will thou stay for the arrival of Julian? 

Bruce: Nay. 

Cassy: Wherefore? Was it not thy wish to illuminate the gathering crowds? 

Bruce: Cassy, my establishment hath been disquieted of late. His presence portends some strange upheaval to our relations. 

Cassy: Come, come. I entreat thee to hearken! Was it his jest, a mockery too audacious, a laughter too cunning, or an unveiling glimpse revealed with disdain? Oh, my dear companion, let no harshness engulf thee, for it turns hands to fists, feathers into coal, and rose to ash in any time. 

Bruce: Like the earthquake of Pompeii, his arrogance shook the classroom discussions more than 

Cassy: Let no green-eyed monstrosity carve into thee. 

Bruce: To care or not to care, that thou hast sided with unwisdom. 

Cassy: Thy utterances spark madness. 

Bruce: Or were thou overshadowed with heated passion? Is thy light the eastern sun after Julian? 

Cassy: Thy siren words dagger into my eardrums. I shall heed thee no more. Our discourse seems blunted by ethereal air. 

Bruce: Neither doth thy vacuous talks matter. Farewell, ungentle lady.